Take one step at a time

Over the past year, I have learnt how to evaluate myself and other people. I have been inspired, pulled down, critically analysed and complimented. One thing I have learnt most of all, is that when you try to do too much, as my step-mom puts it, you "burn the candle from both ends". Then you find that even through all the inspiration and compliments, you just pull yourself down and tell yourself you can't do it.
It has been really tough, this year, there is so much I feel like I've missed out on and it doesn't have to be that way, which is what make it frustrating. This year, my mom should have come see me perform and change and grow, but instead she is halfway around the world. I know it's not as bad as it could be. Thing's could be so much worse and that is what I have concentrated on. That hope and belief and drive, I have clung to. I have used to get this far, I have worked my ass off, but I have been burning my petrol fueled candle from both ends. Now, I'm exhausted, tired and emotional.
Despite having a mom who's not here, but who still plays a large part in my thoughts and actions, I am happy to say I have a family who has been trying to support and help me, even though i have tried to fight against all their advice. Friends who have been so understanding of my silences and months without contact. I have let everything get on top of me and control what I do. Whether I go out or not; who I get to see. It has made me ill and mentally and physically drained.
Now, my advice to myself and to those of you who understand what I'm going through, is to just take one small step at a time. Enjoy everything you do and don't let anything or anyone bring you down. Pray that someday, you will get to where you want to go because, in the end, it's only you who can get you there.
I know where I wanna go, but over doing it and then realising you have to stop and calm down anyway; it's not going to get you there any faster than if you just do your very best and just hope that it is enough. Just take each moment as it comes, without worrying what might come next!
Also, don't forget - to live, love and laugh along the way!